Additional Resources


As a mother of sons who have been diagnosed with mental health challenges and with addictions, I've tried many different tools and resources to help me along my own journey to move out of the "Mom Code" and into my "Love Another Way" strategies so that I could encourage them to make better choices and regain joy in my home and my heart.

Along the way I've found some resources that truly made a difference for me and that I hope can make a difference for you, as well. I'll update this page over time as I find new resources to help.

Barbara

We have many resources available. The list below are links to jump throughout the page to the ones most relevant to you.

Free LWAF Resources

3 Things

These are the 3 pieces of advice I wish I had known years ago. They would have helped me understand my son, Eric, and this disease of addiction and the impact of mental illnesses. You can download it by clicking the button:

Download Now

5 Things

When your adult child is struggling with addiction or mental illness, even the most well-intentioned words can unintentionally create distance or tension. This free guide uncovers the five common phrases many moms say, often from a place of love, that can make things worse, and shows you exactly what to say instead. 

Learn how to communicate in a way that helps you feel heard, reduces conflict, and creates more calm, respectful conversations for both of you.

Free LWAF Online Workshops

  • The Transformative Boundaries Experience Workshop - Free, private & confidential workshop for parents: A Step by Step, Plan For Helping Your Son or Daughter, Overcoming Any Shame/Guilt You May Feel and Finally Reclaiming Your Life. Click here to register now. 
  • Transformative Communications Workshop - Imagine finally learning effective strategies to break through those barriers and connect with the people you care about most. No more shouting matches, begging for understanding, or shutting down emotionally. Watch this workshop now by clicking here.
  • Decode Addiction Workshop - Discover the Secret to Helping Your Adult Child Overcome Addiction (or Mental Illness) and Reclaiming Your Joy! Join our heartfelt workshop designed for caring parents, where you'll learn compassionate strategies to support your loved one while nurturing your own well-being... because you matter.
  • Liberate Your Life Workshop - How to End the Vicious Cycle of People-Pleasing and Finally Put Yourself First, So You Get More of What YOU Want in Life Without Guilt, Shame or Turning into a "Meanie." Register for “From Only Giving to Truly Living” Now.
  • Mind Diseases Workshop - How Everyday Women Just Like You Are Using a "Compassionate Care Plan" to Rebuild Relationships They Once Thought Were Damaged Beyond Repair! Discover The TRUTH About Your Loved One’s Struggle With Addiction or Mental Illness So You Can Love Them Back to Wellness!

Low Cost LWAF Products

  • When your loved one is in the middle of their "mess", it's easy to get frustrated. But that only makes things worse. Here's a better way. Get started with this 4-step strategy you can use to shift how you respond to your loved one, even in the middle of their "mess" using the Manage Any Chaos Blueprint.

  • Love Another Way is a lifestyle. A way of understanding this disease. A new way of behaving toward the disease. Dip your toe into what Love Another Way is with my JumpStart Guide.

  • Love Another Way. Weekly Insights - Curated directly from conversations within The Transformative Boundaries Experience, these short-laser-focused video clips provide both guidance and inspiration on a weekly basis.

  • Communication Quick Start: Strategies in Action gives parents 10 practical strategies—with real-life examples—to choose the right words, tone, and timing so they can stay calm, speak their truth, and finally be heard. 

  • Communicate With Confidence is a self-paced course for women who are ready to reclaim their voice, express their truth without fear of conflict, and build healthier, more authentic relationships through clear and assertive communication.
  • Self-Guided Self-Care is a 21-day experience for women who are tired of feeling overlooked, drained, and unappreciated, and are ready to stop putting themselves last and start feeling more energized, respected, and in control without guilt, shame, or struggle.

LWAF Coached Programs

  • Life is short. Treat yourself (for a change). Get the full VIP Edition of The Transformative Boundaries Experience. Join this amazing group of women. You are worth it.
  • Feeling like you're constantly walking on eggshells in your relationship? Discover the transformative communication tools you need to get what you want without “setting them off” or feeling like “the bad guy.” Transformative Communications – it's time for real results!
  • When your addicted (or mentally ill) loved one misinterprets your well-meaning attempts to help them as "acts of aggression", you need to Decode Addiction to finally get through to them and end the cycle of chaos and worry, all without pleading, yelling or further enabling their disease.
  • It’s Time to Stop Feeling Overlooked, Undervalued, and Exhausted—And Finally Take Back Control of Your Life. Discover the Simple Frameworks That Help Women Set Boundaries, Speak Up with Confidence, and Build a Life That Feels GOOD Again. Join Liberate Your Life now.
  • If you're trying to manage and understand a loved one's mental illness or addiction, you might find my Cognitive Care Plan helpful. It gives you the power to understand Mind Diseases, learn how to communicate with and better support a struggling loved one... reduce your stress and anxiety... and start prioritizing your own health.

Things That Bring Barbara Pockets of Joy

Nifty Metal Straws

  • The single most requested item of all. These are the "nifty metal straws" that Barbara talks about rarely handing out anymore.   Amazon

A Few Book Recommendations

Two Books written by Eric's AA sponsor

Eric's sponsor has actually authored a couple of books that both my kids and I really like. They consist of brief daily passages that are relevant to everyday life and offer some great wisdom. I would definitely suggest checking them out. Plus, they can serve as a cool conversation starter with other people in your life.

  • Inspiration With Explanation: 365 Life-Changing Goals Amazon
  • Inspiration With Explanation: 365 Life-Changing Goals Volume II Amazon

Two very useful books I read very early in my journey.

  • Difficult Conversations: How To Discuss What Matters Amazon
  • I Am Not Sick, I Don't Need Help  Amazon

A recent read that explains dopamine and what happens to the brain during addiction. Highly recommend.

Meet Maybeth Wallace. She's a grandmother who started a book writing project with her grandson.

  • And as addiction took her time and attention, it ended up in limbo. As Beth mastered Love Another Way, she chose to make this book's completion a priority. And then did just that. I, for one, am so glad she did. A true Solution-Oriented Warrior!
  • And the thing is that the message in this book is a wonderful reminder to us adults as well. It has the power to make the world a better place, one person at a time. Glennie's Gift Amazon

For those of you with grandchildren

Pema Chödrön

  • I lived with Pema’s voice in my ears for several years early in Eric’s journey. I still pull her CDs out from time to time. Following her message helps me control my emotions - or rather tame them - and allows me to communicate differently with everyone around me. 
  • She has books also for some of these. I prefer the audio. The first audio listed below I have purchased 6 copies of. I loan it to someone and expect to give it back. People do not give it back. People tell me they love it, but they do not offer to give it back. :) So, I buy a new copy. LOL
  • When Things Fall Apart: Heart Advice for Difficult Times Heart Advice for Difficult Times. Amazon
  • The Places That Scare You: A Guide to Fearlessness in Difficult Times. Amazon
  • Don't Bite the Hook: Finding Freedom from Anger, Resentment, and Other Destructive Emotions. Amazon
     (print unavailable)
  • Good Medicine: How to Turn Pain into Compassion with Tonglen Meditation (2 Discs). Amazon (print unavailable)
  • Getting Unstuck: Breaking Your Habitual Patterns and Encountering Naked Reality. Amazon (print unavailable)
  • Unconditional Confidence: Instructions for Meeting Any Experience with Trust and Courage. Amazon (print unavailable)
  • Making Friends with Your Mind: The Key to Contentment. Amazon (print unavailable)

Brené Brown

  • Everything Brené puts out is worth watching or reading, IMO.
  • The Call to Courage - Wonderful - Netflix
  • The Anatomy of Trust - How the small positive things we do build trust - as she says “in very small moments.” She also talks about how ASKING for help builds trust. And profound comments on how we get value from being the helper in a relationship. 
  • Braving the Wilderness: The Quest for True Belonging and the Courage to Stand Alone. Amazon
  • Dare to Lead: Brave Work. Tough Conversations. Whole Hearts. Amazon
  • Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead. Amazon
  • Atlas of the Heart by Brené Brown: Mapping Meaningful Connection and the Language of Human Experience. Amazon

Dr. Gabor Maté

  • We highly recommend all of Dr. Maté's work and it is informative not just around our addicted loved ones, but may also apply to each of us. Here's the link.

The Anonymous People

  • This is an extremely well-made and impactful movie featuring individuals in sustained recovery. I highly recommend everyone who has any addiction impact in their lives watch it. It's available inexpensively on Amazon for US viewers. Here's the link.

Recommendations from a codependency coach.

  • Gratitude: A Day and Night Reflection Journal Amazon
  • Journey to the Heart: Daily Meditations on the Path to Freeing Your Soul Amazon
  • Happy Light - Kara has been recommending a Happy Light for about a year now. I finally ordered one because I can use all the help I get as we go into the darker months. Here’s the one I chose. Happy Light
  • Personal protection device - that makes noise and flashes light - Kara recommended this for us. I’d like to suggest also it might be a good gift idea for ladies in our lives. Personal Alarm
  • Untamed by Glennon Doyle - Untamed by Glennon Doyle has been highly recommended by a number of our students and clinicians. This is available here on Amazon
  • Partnership for Drug Free Kids 
    • The Parent’s 20-Minute Guide: A guide for parents about how to help their children change their substance use.
    • Beyond Addiction: How Science and Kindness Help People Change How Science and Kindness Help People Change. This is an excellent book and goes with the Parent’s 20-minute guide. Amazon
  • Life is short. Treat yourself (for a change). Get the full VIP Edition of The Transformative Boundaries Experience. Join this amazing group of women. You are worth it.
  • This isn’t a book. It's an experience. Work through it independently with the Essential Edition.
  • Love Another Way is a lifestyle. A way of understanding this disease. A new way of behaving toward the disease. Dip your toe into what Love Another Way is with my JumpStart Guide.
  • Love Another Way. Weekly Insights - Curated directly from conversations within The Transformative Boundaries Experience, these short-laser-focused video clips provide both guidance and inspiration on a weekly basis.
  • When your loved one is in the middle of their "mess", it's easy to get frustrated. But that only makes things worse. Here's a better way. Get started with this 4-step strategy you can use to shift how you respond to your loved one, even in the middle of their "mess" using the Manage Addiction Chaos Blueprint.
  • Your life is about to change. This workshop will give you the answers you've been looking for. Click here to watch it now.
  • When your adult child misinterprets your well-meaning attempts to help them as “acts of aggression”, you need to Decode Addiction to finally get through to your son or daughter and end the cycle of chaos and worry, all without pleading, yelling or further enabling their disease. Join our VIP waiting list. We’ll give you a priority opportunity to join the next session.
  • Feeling like you're constantly walking on eggshells in your relationship? Discover the transformative communication tools you need to get what you want without “setting them off” or feeling like “the bad guy.” Transformative Communications – it's time for real results!

Resources for your kids

Avenues for Loved Ones Living in Bad Situations

If your loved one is stuck, geographically, in a way that may compromise their recovery or progress and they are open to a fresh start, consider pointing them to CoolWorks.com. CoolWorks is a job board for employers who offer live and work opportunities; think resorts, campgrounds, cruise ships, farms, etc. Typical skillsets include service, culinary and outdoors.

Not all positions offered come with housing, but a majority do. If this is a requirement, focus your search on the Jobs with Housing category.

Unsure where they'd like to relocate? Offered is a handy map visualization feature - which shows a higher concentration of offerings in the US West Coast, but the East Coast is not without opportunities either.

Narcan

There is so much we are powerless to do. Here is something we can all do, if we choose.

Get some Narcan - keep it somewhere where it will always be available to you no matter where you are. It may save someone you love; it may save a stranger.

Consider saying to your loved one: "Can I at least give you some Narcan?" Because if we can keep them alive, there is the hope of recovery.

Store in a place where it will not get too hot or cold. Perhaps a purse?

You'll need to do some research in your local area on where you can acquire Narcan.

Read what students have to say about our programs.

Click here


Many of these links are to Amazon. Full disclosure, as an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases.